Alright, alright, let’s talk about this… uh… Oscar… Wembly-what’s-his-name, yeah, that tall fella playin’ basketball. Folks keep jabberin’ ’bout his numbers, so I figured I’d take a look-see myself. Don’t know much ’bout these fancy stats, but I can tell ya if a boy’s good or not, just like I can tell a good melon from a bad one.
So, this Oscar fella, he’s real tall, they say. Taller than my ol’ corn stalks, I reckon. And young too, just a sprout. They got all sorts of numbers for him, like how many points he scores and how many times he grabs that ball off the rim – “rebounds” they call ’em. Sounds like hard work to me.
Now, I saw somethin’ ’bout him scorin’ 20 points in a game. Twenty! That’s a whole lotta buckets, even if you’re countin’ with both hands and feet. But then they say he missed a bunch of shots too. Eight outta twenty made, somethin’ like that. Well, nobody’s perfect, I always say. Even my prize-winning chickens miss a peck or two sometimes. He also got 12 of them rebound things, and that seems mighty good to me. And five fellers he helped score, and blocked seven shots! Kept them other fellas from scorin’, that’s important. That was in a game they lost, though, which ain’t good.
- Points: Seems like he gets a good amount, sometimes 20, sometimes more, sometimes less. Like the weather, it changes.
- Rebounds: This boy snatches that ball like a hawk grabbin’ a field mouse. Twelve in one game, they said. That’s a lot, even for a big fella.
- Assists: Means he helps his buddies score. Five or eleven sometimes, seems like he’s a good teammate, not a ball hog.
- Blocks: Stops the other team from scorin’. Three, five, even seven! He’s like a wall out there, a tall, skinny wall.
- Three-Pointers: Those long shots, worth more points. He makes some, misses some. Like I said, nobody’s perfect. But he made five in one game, they were sayin’, that’s pretty darn good.
Then there was another game, they said he got 34 points! Thirty-four! And 14 rebounds! That’s even better than the first game. Plus, more of them assists, 11 of ’em. And still blockin’ shots, three this time. And even got one steal! Sneaky fella, huh? They even said he had 5 three-pointers in that one. Seems like this boy’s gettin’ better all the time.
They got all these other numbers too, like how many shots he makes from far away – “three-pointers,” they call ’em. And how many times he swats the ball away from the other fellas – “blocks,” that is. They even got somethin’ called “field goal percentage.” Sounds complicated. All I know is, you gotta put the ball in the hoop to win, and this Oscar fella seems to do that alright, most of the time.
They say he makes about three and a half blocks every game. That’s like, every game he’s stoppin’ the other team three or four times, at least. That’s like having a scarecrow in the field that actually scares away the crows, not just stands there lookin’ pretty. And he has made 190 of them long shots, those three pointers, in his career so far, that’s a lot of long shots if you ask me. He’s a young’un, so that number is gonna get bigger and bigger I bet.
Seems like this Oscar Wembly-whatever is a pretty good basketball player. Tall, young, and can score, rebound, and block shots. He ain’t perfect, but who is? Even my prize-winning pumpkin had a little blemish last year. But he’s got potential, that’s for sure. Reminds me of a good ol’ workhorse, strong and steady, and gets the job done. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I gotta go check on my chickens. They’re probably wonderin’ where their supper is.
So, if you’re lookin’ for Oscar Wembly-guy’s stats, just remember he’s tall, scores a lot, grabs that ball like it’s the last biscuit on the plate, helps his teammates, and stops the other fellas from scorin’. And he’s gettin’ better all the time, just like a good wine or a fine piece of cheese. That’s all there is to it, simple as that.
